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I’m begrudgingly hiring someone to do a resume and cover letter makeover. Begrudgingly, because it seems absurd that I should need that service, but I’m not getting results myself. And in considering Einstein’s definition of insanity — “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results” — it’s high time I shake things up after almost a year of getting no where.
When I was in high school — a long, long time ago in the 1990s — a conscientious student took at SAT prep class to ensure the best scores possible. I spent my summer with the Princeton Review, an instructor who brought a pet hedgehog in for show & tell, and a guy who frequently arrived to class shoeless because he liked to drive barefoot. That class covered the parental responsibility of their child’s college preparedness.
Today, parents hire pre-school admissions counselors and overbook their 2 year olds. Teens are more self-conscious than ever; thanks to media, parents, and peers; creating a need for self-esteem coaching. SAT prep classes are no longer optional, and college application counselors are run of the mill, but it’s not the end of the coaching story. Pending college grads need resume writers and career coaches before setting off for the real world. Just around the corner is the quarterlife crisis, another bump in the road we all work to smooth.
Once you’ve made peace with whatever kind of career you want to have, the promotion choo-choo is calling all-aboard. So you can hire coaches to make you a better communicator and to develop your leadership potential.
But let’s say you settle into a job you love, surrounded by great friends. If you are unhappy that you haven’t found “the one” yet, you can turn to a variety of dating coaches. But once you’ve found “the one”, chances are you’ll want to be one size smaller come your wedding day, so you can hire coach support for that endeavor as well, beyond the personal trainers that push you to do one more set of crunches.
Since women juggle their career with a larger slice of the parenting pie in many homes, a motherhood coach just might be in order. But don’t fret young dads, you can hire the sleep coach (I’m not kidding) to best manage baby zzzzs, so that everyone gets a more restful shut eye.
At this point, you’re dragging your children into the world of coaching, while you turn to a variety of experts for your own growth at different stages of your personal and professional life. At what point is enough, enough? This coaching culture reinforces the feeling of inadequacy that the advertising industry works so hard to instill. Do we really have to spend what amounts to a second college degree on umpteen sets of rules on how to be good, better, best? Can you ever be good enough at anything to warrant putting a stop to the coaching? When I’m in my final years of life, will I be hiring the hospice coach that will teach me to drape, just so, across my pillow, so I can expire with the best show of dignity and resignation?
It makes you wonder, what happens to all the people who can’t afford coaching?
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