Tag Archive for 'Susan Marque'

The End of the road with your life coach

photo by tonywl

Earlier, I shared the insights of 2 coaches to discuss the considerations when choosing a life coach. Equally important is the decision to break from coaching, much like a fledging preparing to leave the nest.

Intuition and your coaching momentum guides your decision.  Per Susan,

When you feel ready to push yourself into better and better living and feel you don’t need it anymore.  I have on occasion graduated clients if I feel they are not moving forward anymore and they would get more benefit having to figure things out on their own.

Lynda reminds clients to stay outcome oriented.

At its best, coaching is a dynamic, collaborative partnership that supports the client to set and achieve goals, recognize and overcome obstacles to success, and acquire new tools and skill sets that are portable and transferable.  While coaching is a process, it’s a process that should produce measurable outcomes that both coach and client can see.

So it’s time to move on when:

  • You’ve accomplished the goals you set out to achieve
  • You decide that coaching isn’t the right modality for you at this time
  • You feel you’ve gotten all you

Courtney seconds the above opinions. You’re ready for a break from a coach,

When your goals are achieved. When you feel complete. When the relationship is not fruitful. If you are not doing your homework, something is up that needs to be discussed. . . You have to [come] to coaching wanting something. If you don’t know what you want, that’s the first thing I hope [your] coach will ask!

In my experience with therapy and coaching, at some point you hit a plateau. Despite ongoing effort, I just can’t seem to move forward any further with that individual. Maybe it’s because I get too comfortable with the hired party so their nudging is less effective. Or I’ve found that they hold certain paradigms dear that I just can’t embrace, and, after incorporating into my life the strategies and exercises that worked for me and disregarding ones that don’t, it’s time to find someone with a new set of tools I can rummage through.  Sometimes, breaking up is hard to do, but it may just be the next step in your process.

One final note on the coaching experience from Courtney:

You should like your coach. And you should feel that you are making clear progress toward your desired outcomes together. A strong coach will design an alliance with you, hold your agenda (not theirs) and will make it clear that you can end the coaching relationship at any time that it’s not working. As a coach, my clients come to me to help them get clear on their values, vision and goals. Then we forward the action together and build in accountability. Most of the progress happens in between the calls. The client is the one who does the work. The coach guides, helps deepen the learning and holds the agenda.

I again extend my thanks to our illustrious coaches.

If you have any questions about hiring or firing a life coach, please post them below; I’ll see to it that one of my guest coaches replies.

Lynda Levy is a psychologist and life coach dedicated to helping women achieve their professional potential based in the Los Angeles area.  Though her website is under construction, she can be reached via email.

Courtney Macavinta is an award-winning and nationally recognized journalist, coach, speaker, and author. As a coach, she works primarily with women and teen girls.

Susan Marque is a food and life coach that uses nutrition to help her clients achieve their life goals; she’s also based in the Los Angeles area.  She previously stopped by my blog to discuss office nutrition dos and don’ts.

Disclaimer: I have never been a paying client of the above coaches, though I did serve as a test client during Courtney’s training.

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A guide to life coach selection

photo by tonywl

Earlier this week my post on the the excessive number of life coaches available to professionals rankled a few Brazen Careerist community members, who came to the defense of the coaching profession.  Having worked with several coaches myself, I thought it would be a worthwhile exercise to ask a few what advice they had for prospective clients in search of a coach.

One of the issues brought up in the comments section is how to distinguished qualified coaches from the amateurs who can do more harm than good.  As with any good debate, even the experts don’t always agree on what earns the title coach.

For Lynda, coach-specific training is important:

This should be a no-brainer, but it’s not as simple as it appears.  Coaching is a new and unregulated field, and as you point out in your original piece, a wide variety of service providers call themselves coaches these days.

That said, a Life Coach (sometimes called a Personal Coach) who takes the profession of coaching seriously will have trained at some type of coach training school.  The International Coach Federation is the gold standard for accrediting coach training schools and provides a list of accredited training programs on their website.

Susan, however, cautions that formal training is not always the best route to becoming a great coach.

You can not learn how to empathize or guide people in the same way as when you have lived through and overcome the very same or similar obstacles.  I did learn quite a bit from teachers over the years and how human beings operate and how to let go of the blocks that are big stoppers but I live and breath what I teach so it isn’t coming from the outside.  I’m passionate and did not choose coaching as a profession it chose me. . .

The most qualified coaches that I learned from where not the ones who went to coaching schools or even had degrees but who have personally overcome many obstacles and have a knack for seeing the greater picture and many possibilities and are continually growing and learning themselves.

Both agree that people skills are incredible valuable and are vital to a good life coach.  Here’s what you should be on the look out for.

Lynda:

Again, a seemingly obvious but difficult to pin down category.  A potential client can discern whether their prospective coach has these skills in two ways:

  • look at the coach’s background to see what the coach has done in the past
  • get a personal experience of the coach to see how they interact with you (most coaches offer a free introductory session or lower-fee seminar or workshop where you can get a sense of what it would be like to work with them)

Susan makes the point that a coach who is qualified to work with one client, might not be the best fit for another:

I think a coach is a better match also if you particularly resonate with that person and can be pushed into your greater good by them.  No matter how great a guide may be, if you can not connect with them in some way and be able to take the coaching I don’t think it is a good fit.  Neither is a coach who just lets you spew your problems or past without being the catalyst for real change in your life.

Lynda also wants prospective clients to consider the ethical boundaries set by their coaches.

This covers everything from clearly defining what the coach does and does not do; their fees and payment policies; the boundaries of the coaching relationship; returning phone calls and emails in a timely fashion; making appropriate referrals when necessary; and knowing when coaching is not the appropriate modality for a particular client.

I’d like to add that it’s important to clarify what confidentiality expectations you have as a client. I want a non-disclosure agreement presented on day one to ensure my tales don’t travel.   I worked with a coach who realized she limited her own career by maintaining complete confidentiality.  An edit to her policy for clients later down the road  maintained her right to use her experiences coaching you (respecting your confidentiality by using another name) when she wrote her books and articles, unless the client specifically opted out in writing.

When asked about other intangibles to keep in mind when selecting a coach, Lynda reminds clients that the relationship should be about you.

- Is this coach a person you are comfortable with?
- Does the coach support you to define and achieve your goals without imposing their own agenda on you?
- Is the coach flexible and open to your questions and feedback?
- Is the coach consistently supportive of your goals?
- Is the coach gracious when you want to end the coaching relationship and always mindful of your best interests?

As Susan adds, don’t be afraid to shop around.
It’s a bit like choosing a doctor.  Find the coach you feel comfortable working with and it’s okay to get second and third opinions before you commit to a lengthy agreement.

Also, don’t be afraid to ask around.  The coaching industry is booming and you, more than likely, know someone who can recommend a good coach through personal experience.

Have you worked with a life coach?  What tips can you add to maximize your odds of finding a good match?

I’d like to thank Lynda and Susan for taking the time to share their insights from the other end of the coaching experience.  Tune in tomorrow when our coaches respond to the question: How does a client know when he or she is ready to move on from a particular coach?

Lynda Levy is a psychologist and life coach dedicated to helping women achieve their professional potential based in the Los Angeles area.  Though her website is under construction, she can be reached via email.

Susan Marque is a food and life coach that uses nutrition to help her clients achieve their life goals; she’s also based in the Los Angeles area.  She previously stopped by my blog to discuss office nutrition dos and don’ts.

Disclaimer: I have never been a paying client of either of the above coaches, but I still like them both lots.

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Fueling your body and your mind: nutrition tips from food coach Susan Marque

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It’s 11am on Monday, and you’re feeling a bit peckish. That handful of Cheerios you snarfed down before hitting the gym at 6:30 this morning has long since been digested. A ding from your inbox alerts you to leftover birthday cupcakes in the kitchen — they’re free and one will tide you over ‘til lunch. The vultures circle and those cupcakes are gone 10 minutes later. With a major report deadline looming, lunch is no longer an option, just wishful thinking. At 3pm, another ding from your inbox. Leftovers from a client presentation mean a midday meal after all!! You help yourself to the leftover pasta and garlic bread. By 6pm you’re dragging, but you have a late night ahead of you, courtesy of that report your team just can’t seem to finish. Coffee from the kitchen, burgers and fries from the diner down the block, you get comfortable in your ergonomic chair while you work late in the name of teamwork.

On Tuesday, repeat.

Sound familiar? I know a number of people that survive on a diet of sugar, starch and caffeine because it worked for them in college (with the addition of alcohol as the fourth food group).

I recently started to notice that on days when my sugar intake is up, my energy is way down. My commitment to adding veggies to my diet, thanks to my local farmer’s market and wheat grass supplements just isn’t enough. It’s sad that I’ll use premium oil in my car to keep it in good health at 14 years of age, but my primary standards for fueling my body are looks good, smells good, tastes good.

For some great advice on how to fuel my brain and body whether working 40 or 70 hours a week, I turned to food and life coach Susan Marque, who teaches clients to optimize their health through nutrition. With more than a decade of experience, starting with addressing the relationship of food to her own health issues, Susan is a popular Hollywood resource for healthier and more energized living.

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Despite hearing how breakfast is the most important meal of the day over and over again, it can be hard to fit in during the time crunch between waking up and getting to work. What are some quick to prepare or ready-to-travel breakfasts that will fuel my morning?

I understand that for some people getting up and going can be a challenge in the am. It does get easier when we address the entire body. You’ll wake up with more energy and be much more alert when the fuel you are living on is a bit different. To just address breakfast. You can have it all ready to go and take with you from the evening before. Homemade granola bars are an option but my favorite would be whole grain cereals you cook up yourself. Quinoa with apples and cinnamon is one of my favorites [see recipe below]. You could prepare it even days in advance just reheat or eat cold. Breakfast wrap type of sandwiches are another options or even some steamed (much easier on the digestion system) bread with almond butter once in a while.

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While ideally, we’d all like to get enough sleep, what do you recommend for a pick me up on days we just can’t keep our eyes open? Is there a better option than a trip to Starbucks or a can of Red Bull?

Getting off the caffeine treadmill will actually give you more energy once you are free. Again, here, it would be much better to address the bigger picture of what you are doing over all than looking for that quick fix for the moment. Quick fixes should be used sparingly and only when needed. We’ve unfortunately been trained to go from fix to fix and not to create lasting outstanding health. If you seriously cannot keep your eyes open, a nap or meditation would be better than any food ideas.

If I’m packing a lunch for the office, what kinds of foods should I consider regular staples of my mid-day meal? What will keep me energized and focused all afternoon?

Whole foods such as whole grains, beans, veggies, etc., will keep you much more alert and energized. Stay clear of refined products such as breads, pastas, or desserts. One of my favorite things to teach is how to make things from these staples easily and quickly for the guy/girl on the go.

In an effort to plan ahead for days I don’t have time to make lunch at home or leave the office for a salad, what snacks should I keep stocked in my desk or at the back of the office refrigerator?

Ooooh, I love this question because no one really asks me this. I think having some homemade toasted pumpkin seeds (don’t keep them too long though ‘cuz after a week or two they start to turn rancid once cooked.) that are low in fat and high in zinc, can be a good snack. Bring fruit to work, especially ones like apples. You might make extra of soups or bean dishes and store some in your freezer at work for those especially busy moments. I hope that instead of skipping a meal though you could at least order from a fairly healthy place to have food delivered to you.

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Sometimes a vending machine is as far as I can stray from my desk for a meal, what are my best options?

Order in instead! The telephone is even closer. The best options from a vending machine would be water and perhaps some sort of nut or seeds in a little package.

In walking away from what I’ll call the “college diet” to a more well-rounded one, do you find your clients have more success cutting out their cookies or Cheetos cold turkey or gradually replacing their vices with healthier fare?

I think it is entirely individual. I have many different techniques I utilize with different people. Whatever works the best for each person is what I’m for and my idea of healthy might be a couple of steps more than what you might even be aware of. I like to offer lots of options and see how they land for someone.

Any final thoughts?

Even if what you eat isn’t all that important to you, it should be. It’s the base you live your life from and if you create habits that support you, you will accomplish much more than when you are fighting your physiology. Many people are surviving and getting by using excuses for their poor eating habits that eventually lead to a dramatic diagnosis. I had the ailments early on so I was forced to learn to live or finally die. I chose health and found out how simple it can be. I encourage everyone to learn how food really works and not what the diets tell you is “right”. There is a fad, craze or study coming out all the time to keep you interested or confused. Whole foods have not changed since the beginning of time and are always there to support us. Learning how they work is invaluable!

To keep up with Susan’s latest nutritional tips, visit SusanMarque.com where you can sign up for her monthly e-newsletter. Check out the archives for her hangover cure.

To get you started, here’s one of Susan’s easy breakfast recipes to kick start your day.

Breakfast Quinoa with Apples and Cinnamon

This dish just satisfies me in the morning without the heavy feeling that I often feel from oatmeal.

  • 1 Cup Quinoa, rinsed and sorted
  • 3 Cups good water (soak the quinoa overnight if you can)
  • Pinch of sea salt
  • 1 apple, cored and cut into small chunks
  • 1 tsp. cinnamon (more if you like or have a sweet apple)
  • Flax oil to taste

Place the water, quinoa, apples and cinnamon in a pot and bring to a boil. Add the pinch of sea salt, turn down the heat, place a lid on the pot and simmer for 15-20 minutes until all the water is absorbed. Remove from the heat and stir in flax oil to taste. Enjoy!

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